I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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