No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Randomize
