Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
