if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
