this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
