The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
