Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
