The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
