at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
