my vag is so smooth its legendary
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
How external is "for external use only"?
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
