Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry brittanykhollaaa hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(646): View more from New York

I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.

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(440): View more from Ohio

Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."

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(216): View more from Ohio

ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.

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(407): View more from Florida

She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.

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(+61): View more from Australia

We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.

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(416): View more from Toronto

Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?

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(901): View more from Tennessee

I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.

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(805): View more from California

Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.

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