she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
