What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
