physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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