if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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