I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
