sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
We're too hungover to prance.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
