weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
