Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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