We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Just puked most of my soul out..
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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