Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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