Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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