Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
