She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize