Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
