i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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