At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
so let's talk penis.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize