Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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