so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Randomize
