I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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