ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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