I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Randomize