Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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