Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Randomize
