I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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