so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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