I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize