i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
i think my cat just said my name.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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