your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
this just has baby written all over it
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
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