i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
