Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
