it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
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