The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
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