She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Randomize
