Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
