I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
