i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize