Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Randomize
