You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
