Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
