It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
