Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Randomize
